Seeing as the couple has never been spotted in public together before, many felt like they’d been left in the dark—and maybe that’s a good thing

Instagram.com/KatrinaKaif

In the age of social media and oversharing, the notion of a secret celebrity wedding can seem like an oxymoron. And yet, Bollywood’s top names have increasingly been favouring hush-hush ceremonies ever since Anushka Sharma tied the knot with Virat Kohli against the postcard-perfect backdrop of Tuscany in 2017.

You fret that you’ve been left in the dark—newly-weds Katrina Kaif and Vicky Kaushal scaled an unthinkable monolith by never being photographed together prior to their wedding—but you also forgive, because you’re invested in seeing how the story turns out.

Having spent their entire lives in front of the camera, shouldn’t they bow down to the public interest in their wedding, you ask? And yet, it is for this very reason—constantly exposing themselves to scrutiny and being put on trial in the court of public opinion—that celebrities choose to keep this part of their life to themselves.

The most cynical among us would say that secret shindigs are a publicity blitzkrieg, and they wouldn’t be entirely wrong. In the absence of any official news from the couple, the public has been latching on to the tiniest scraps being handed out over social media.

Case in point: A blurry rear shot of a delivery guy ferrying designer bags to the actor’s residence grabbed eyeballs on Instagram—1.7 million of them at last count, to be precise.

Optimists, meanwhile, would argue that secret weddings are the great equaliser. An intimate ceremony with a tightly-controlled guest list means that the rest of the world, including A-list insiders, has to rely on official information that the stars themselves deign to provide.

Perhaps Priyanka Chopra was tapping out those heart emojis in the comments section at midnight while hunched over the sink with a half-forgotten makeup remover wipe in her other hand?

Maybe not, but there is some comfort to be found in the fact that secret weddings have made spectators of A-listers as well—we are all now unified in watching the proceedings unfold from the 1080×1080 pixels of an Instagram post.

For Kaif, a secret wedding also symbolises the chance to reclaim narrative control over her life. Having spent nearly two decades under the spotlight, the star has routinely had her personal space invaded—the long-range lens that snapped her in a bikini on the beaches of Ibiza serves as a harsh reminder of the inexorable voyeurism baked within celebrity culture.

It is an unfortunate common ground that she shares with women throughout history, from Princess Diana to Jennifer Lawrence, who have had private moments of their life publicised without their consent or, in many cases, stolen from their phone.

For her part, the star emerged from the crisis stronger, famously swearing to never don a two-piece on-screen again and reportedly adding a no-bikini clause to future movie contracts. But it doesn’t detract from the fact that non-consensual celebrity photos rob them of all agency.

The problem is further compounded by the accelerated pace of technology—anybody with a smartphone can now become part of the paparazzi, while we, the audience, become the voyeur. Understandable then, that Kaif has chosen to maintain an ironclad leash on her private life ever since, culminating in an information blackout for the rumoured two years of her courtship with Kaushal.

Tanya Vasunia, a psychologist and published researcher, believes that a secret wedding away from prying eyes was par for the course. “On a day that is so personal and intimate, you may not want the entire world’s thoughts and opinions.

Keeping the ceremony private helps you focus on what matters—the moment that you and your partner commit to one another for a lifetime,” she elaborates. While the age of social media has done much to blur boundaries, she cautions that it has also created a misplaced sense of entitlement.

“The pandemic has further torn down the walls and offered a private glimpse into the lives of our favourite stars. While this can be good—every workout that you see a celebrity labouring through is a reminder that they don’t wake up perfect—it has also created a false sense of entitlement about needing to know what is going on in their lives all the time,” she says.

Despite the frenzied hysteria of the past week, Vasunia lauds Kaif’s decision to keep her nuptials private. “Since weddings are generally considered a public affair in India, many would have felt that they “have to” involve everyone.

However, as I like to keep reminding my clients, the minute the words “have to” enter a sentence, you know you are making a decision from an unhealthy perspective. You don’t ever have to do anything, but what you can do is make your own choices,” she asserts.

Eschewing a public spectacle in favour of an intimate ceremony with her loved ones has put Kaif firmly back in the driver’s seat—and with every photo drop on Instagram, she is reiterating that it is her manicured hand manoeuvring the gearstick.

If unsolicited pictures can divested a celebrity of power, then the unhurried pace of her wedding release on Instagram is here to reclaim what’s been taken. With more images expected to be shared in the coming days, you are cordially invited to bless the happy couple and witness the festivities—but it will be at a time and pace of their choosing.